Tags: Real News

readme booth to bring back factory towns

June 23, 2024, 10:54 a.m.
By: Abe James | Vol 1, Issue 6

Visit the Readme booth during Carnival! Or if you missed Carnival, what’s wrong with you? Absolute buffoon. Were you even looking? We are located somewhere between where CS kids go to die and Dietrich students go to thrive off of adult validation. It’ll be like a fun challenge for everyone except IS students, who aren’t allowed to spill the beans. If they do, they get hunted for sport by the ghosts of Andrew Carnegie’s uncles and uncles-in-law.

Our Booth is a totally immersive experience in which you get to pretend you are an impoverished employer working for us, the railroad tycoons. Super duper cool, right guys? Like all good Booths, we have fun games to play such as mining coal or laying down train tracks. When you’re done, you get a Readme coin which you can use to buy amenities like spare clothes, soap and water. We also provide Readme stamps which can be used to purchase food! We aren’t so boring as to just provide the snacks, it’s more fun for people to work for it! The extra fun part is the stamps cannot be used to buy coin items and vice versa. How cool! It’s basically like a strategy video game, but in real life and much harder since CMU students have twigs for arms.

You might consider using the coins and stamps elsewhere, but that’s where you’d get an extra big laugh. Readme coins and stamps are not usable in other booths and can only be used in the Readme Booth. Of course not, they’re Readme exclusives! I mean, the coins and stamps are just too valuable to be used anywhere else.

Our build draws architectural inspiration from Pullman, Illinois, and Lowell, Massachusetts during the Industrial Revolution. It’s kinda old-school but that's just part of the whimsy. We also have a sickly wife and kids to really amp up that charm and add to that immersive experience. I mean, you want Amelia and Bart to get a good education don’t you? So get back to work!

Hahhahaha, you can’t leave now. :)