CMU Announces New Tradition - Inverse Bungee Jumping
As we all know, CMU has a long history of inventing new traditions, setting itself apart from all other universities in the observable universe. From buggy racing, to releasing starving Scottish Terriers after hiding students covered in peanut butter, to painting the fence, the Harvard of Appalachia has a wealth of interesting activities it gets to call its own. Adding to this proud list, a new sport has captured the hearts of CMU students and onlookers alike. Inverse Bungee Jumping, as the sport has been dubbed, involves strapping participants to a bungee cord anchored to the ground, and raising them upwards with a crane. Once the crane has brought the participant to the highest possible elevation, and the chord is fully in tension, the crane releases its load and the athlete slams into the ground at mach 7. One varsity inverse bungee jumper representing the fraternity Kappa Gamma Beta, Cindy Gao, was reported to have hit the asphalt in the College of Fine Arts parking lot so fast that they instantly sublimated. While KGB is not the only Greek organization to participate in this annual event, they have caused the greatest number of human-shaped imprints in the CFA pavement. Who knows, someone might manage to blast through Earth to China one day.