Kyle Hynes
📍 Lancaster, NH
Staffwriter
International Relations and Politics, Statistics and Machine Learning, DC '27
he/him
Bio
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Fun Fact
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Previous Work
Top 10 ways to die during Carnival
1. Buggy crashes: Is this one even close? Buggy is like having kids - Âit makes no sense at all when you actually think about it. It’s highly dangerous. The preparation takes up several months of your life, and leads to uncountable sleepless nights. And yet, we can’t seem to stop, because it’s so central to who we are as Tartans. It’s a miracle no one has yet died flying around...
CMU to literally go to war with U of Pitt
PITTSBURGH, Pa.  The cannons were readied. The troops were in position. We had the element of surprise. Twelve twentyÂfive p.m. President Jahanian, standing in Napoleonic fashion behind the frontline that had assembled atop Warner Hall, let his arm drop and gave the order. “Fire!” Four explosions, and four westbound cannonballs fired from Carnegie Mellon’s most archaic weapons, filled the air<...